


Linstead One Shots

by faliceplease



Category: Chicago PD, Linstead - Fandom
Genre: Chicago PD's Finest, F/M, Linstead, Romance, babes, valentines day
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-02-14
Updated: 2016-07-29
Packaged: 2018-05-20 08:23:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 14,728
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5998681
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/faliceplease/pseuds/faliceplease
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Send One Shot requests here<br/> http://erin-linstead.tumblr.com/ask</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Erin sat at her computer and tapped her fingers against her desk. It was a slow day at the office, and well she didn't want to complain abou the lack of crimes, but that was her job, without crime she was just about useless. 

She looked over at Ruzek who looked like he was about to fall asleep himself. Paperwork wasn't exactly the fun part of this job, nobody liked filling it out, but Sergeant Platt was adament that they all finish it this week, and Voight was in agreeance. He said they weren't getting any more cases until they got through it all, which sucked on a regular day, but especally on Valentines Day which you wouldn't even know it was such an occasion. 

As the only female in the room, Erin thought she might possibly be the only one who knew of the occasion. She looked over at Jay who was busy typing away with that little concerning frown he gets when he's concentrating. It was cute really, but what wasn't cute was the lack of romance. Their relationship mightn't be like the Notebook, but she thought he'd at least mention the day, which he had not and it made her feel a little misplaced, especially since from the moment she walked into the precinct she was welcomed by Platt's giant bouquet of flowers, that she liked showing off to everyone who came in. Curse whoever decided that woman should be in love honestly.

"Want a coffee?" Erin asked after she had walked over to Jay's desk. He looked up and smiled at her. "Ah, sure. I could use one." He answered, saving his recent file before following her to the break room. He stood back as she switched on the kettle, and waited for the water to heat up.

"Not the best Valentine's Day I've ever had." She mentioned casually to test the waters. Jay just nodded and gave her a little smile.

"I mean it's got to beat last year, when we had those V'Day killers..." He pointed out, taking out a mug ready for his cuppa. She frowned, opening her mouth to say something but against her better judgement, she decided to keep it to herself. 

"That was a killer." She nodded after a moment, and listened out for the hum of the kettle. She started spooning out coffee for both of them, and reached out to grab the sugar jar. Jay curled his hand around her wrist and smiled.

He spoke in a low whisper, as if he was afraid of other people hearing what he had to say. A shiver ran down her arm as she felt his hold against her skin. "Are you doing anything tonight?" He asked her, leaning across grab the milk.

She frowned and looked at him, shaking her head. "It's a little late for you to ask me out on Valentine's pal." She told him, laughing softly to herself. She poured the hot water into her mug and walked back out to her desk to enjoy it. She just couldn't believe him, waiting until now to ask if she had any plans? It just didn't make any sense.

Later that afternoon, Erin was sitting by her locker with Kim Burgess sitting beside her. She didn't know how hard it must be for Kim, spending this holiday alone after ending an engagement. She seemed to be holding up okay though which was a good sign at least. 

"How're you doing today?" Erin asked, reaching out to give her arm a gentle squeeze. She smiled and put on a brave face, obviously not wanting anybody to feel sorry for her. She just wanted to pretend like this was any other day really, she didn't want to spend time thinking about what wasn't meant to be. She loved Adam, she really did. She just didn't know how to love him when he didn't love her the same way. 

Erin understood this, she did. She understood what is was like to have all of this love in your heart, and not knowing how to give that to the right people. At least that's what it used to be like. She had Jay in her life now, and maybe today wasn't one of his best moments but she knew he loved her. 

"How about you?" Kim asked, turning it back on Erin who has been through a lot lately. She admired the detective, who was pretty much who she aspired to be in a few years time. Kim knew that she didn't have to be in intelligence to be like Erin, she just had to be the best damn cop she could be. 

"I'm good. Yeah." Erin answered, feeling a little silly about this whole thing. "Do you think there's like this guy's handbook where they simultaneously forget about Valentine's Day?" She questioned curiously, laughing a little at the randomness of this conversation.

Kim just laughed and shrugged her shoulders, she could tell that Jay had messed up big time here, even the girls with the hardest shells loved a bit of romance on the most romantic day of the year. 

"He hasn't done anything?" She asked, and Erin snorted and shook her head.

"Not unless you count him asking if I'm busy tonight." She said in a light hearted tone. She didn't feel so light hearted, but whatever. This was just one of those things she had to deal with. They didn't have a perfect relationship, and maybe she hasn't ever mentioned Valentine's Day to him before, but still..

"Men!" Kim laughed, shaking her head at that. She laced up her boots and slammed her locker shut after a long hard day's work. She was ready to go home, run herself a bath and forget that this day existed. 

Erin offered to walk out with her, but Kim insisted she had something to do first. They parted ways and Erin walked down the hallway, thinking about what food she had in her refrigerator. She didn't think there was much else other than take out that could be a week old at least.  
Erin wandered down the stairs and out to her car, feeling a little deflated. She hadn’t expected Jay to go all out, but she had thought he’d at least leave her a nice message, or say something sweet to her. That’s what boyfriends do, at least that’s what she thought they did.  
She can remember growing up with the Voight’s, and Hank would always leave a bouquet of daisies on the kitchen table every valentine’s day. It wasn’t anything spectacular, but it happened every year and it was beautiful. 

He was the man she looked up to, the man who showed her the way men are supposed to treat you. That’s something she will never know how to thank him for.  
When she was finally home, she kicked off her shoes as she walked in, and almost jumped out of her skin. “What are you doing here?” She asked Jay, as she clutched her belt where her gun was holstered. 

“It’s Valentine’s Day...” He pointed out, shaking his head at her. She looked over at kitchen bench, which was covered in all of her favourite foods. She walked over and inspected all of the take out containers and smiled to herself.

Who needed a big fancy meal, when your boyfriend bought you all of your favourite treats, huh?  
“I wasn’t sure if you were a rose petal kind of girl, so I bought some just in case. But I thought champagne was at least a little bit fancier than the usual beer.” He said as he held up the bottle.

She nodded her head, tears welling in her eyes as she realised how wrong she had been. It wasn’t the lack of interest or romance, it was his uncertainty. He didn’t know what she expected, but that didn’t stop him from trying for her.  
“I love you.” She breathed, reaching over to pull him into her body. “I love you, you big idiot.” She said into his neck as she melted up against his chest.  
This was her man, and this was her kind of Valentine’s Day.


	2. Let's Do Something Crazy

Erin admired the new addition to her hand, the diamond twinkled against the light above the bed, and she still couldn't believe what had happened. The sheets covered her naked body, and the naked one that lay beside her. 

Jay was sound asleep, snoring lightly. They'd had the longest day, most of it was still a blur in her mind. She still couldn't believe that they were married. When The rumour mill had first started churning about Kelly getting married she'd pegged him a little on the crazy side. It just seemed so unlike him and yet now there she was in bed with her new husband, someone she hadn't even been dating. Her situation wasn't too unlike Kelly's and maybe she was crazy. But the man who lay beside her had told her that he loved her and the minute he had, she knew she felt the same way. 

The more she admired the ring the more she put off thinking about how Voight was going to react. There was no way she was going to be able to hide the ring if she kept it on at work, there was no way she'd be able to hide the relationship and quite frankly it scared her even thinking about how that would all go down. She wanted to live in the current moment which included how happy she was by the recent string of events. 

She found herself leaning over and pressing a gentle kiss against Jay's temple, something just a few days ago she would never have done. The trip between the bedroom and the bathroom was short enough to not need to get dressed. She rushed across the room stark naked and didn't look back at her sleeping beauty. 

This whole thing was crazy, yesterday she'd gone to work like normal and today she was waking up married to her partner. 

She was proud of the fact that alcohol had no part in their decision, so many things happened since leaving work and waking up this morning hangover free. The details were scattered, but she could still remember exactly what Jay had said to her. 

When he looked in her eyes in the middle of town, "I love you Erin." He'd told her like he had only just realised the fact. 

Her stomach was in knots, everything has completely changed within a matter of hours. 

She had stood there staring at him for a moment before reaching out for his body, needing to feel his heartbeat for herself. She'd smiled the biggest smile she'd ever had to and said to him, "I love you too." 

The delight on his face was enough for her, it was enough to prove to herself that he was genuine, to prove that he wasn't going to hurt her. She had pushed him away all this time and yet there he was standing right in front of her declaring his love and he meant it. 

She pulled him down, her hand pressed against the back of his neck. Her lips squashed against his within seconds of her movement. It was like her lips were made to kiss his, she'd never felt so many emotions all at once, 

Her lips felt like they were on fire, like Jay was the hottest thing on the planet right then and there, she pulled away realising they were kissing in the middle of an empty street with only a street light to keep them company. She grabbed hold of his hand, it felt big and strong against hers. She'd smiled and handed him her car keys. "Let's get out of here." 

He didn't have to be told twice, the girl of his dreams had just given him everything. 

Now she stood in front of her mirror, her heart pounded against her bare chest, her eyes glanced down to her body, a blush peaked across her cheeks as she counted numerous hickys bruised over her skin. She bit down on her lip and held back a happy laugh. This was really happening? She couldn’t believe she was really there. It all felt like a dream. 

As she begun running the shower, and the water fell down her body, her mind wandered into last night again. She remembered getting into her car, it was strange going straight into the passenger side and Jay had been joking about how masculine he was now feeling.  
She didn’t care though, in that moment she knew she was going to be doing something crazy with the man she loved. She’d only recently allowed herself to admit that’s how she felt, but ever since she’d done that everything had changed. The sky was bluer, his eyes were brighter and the world was a better place, especially when she got to lock up some bad guy every evening. 

Jay didn’t tell her where they were going, they were just driving into the night as he called it. She fiddled with the radio and landed on a random station that played romantic tunes their entire journey to the other side of the city. 

“Jay, where are you taking me?” She asked him after they’d been driving for what felt like forever. 

He turned to face her with a big goofy smile on his face, “I just like driving you around.” 

“You can drive me around any time. Just not while we’re working.” She told him, with a snorted laugh as she noticed his reaction. 

“How crazy do you want to be tonight?” He asked her, parking her car on the side of the road. She sat up straighter and looked at him. 

“What kind of crazy are we talking? The Hangover crazy or getting married crazy?” She asked him, her eyes widening at the smile he had upon the word marriage. 

“Are you kidding me?” She asked, laughing nervously. “You haven’t even slept with me yet.” She pointed out, but the look in his eye wasn’t leaving. “You seriously want to do a Kelly Severide?” She asked him, but Jay’s head was up in the clouds. 

“Are you trying to scare me off because I think it’s working a little...” 

He shook his head, “We don’t have to get married, anything we do tonight will be crazy since we’ve been dating for five minutes.” 

“Says the guy who wants to get married right away.” She teased, “I mean I love your enthusiasm but you do realise if we got married without inviting Voight I would get into some serious trouble. That man may be hard on the outside but this would kill him.”

“So we invite him.” Jay reached over to grab her phone from the cup holder. She reached over to try and stop him but he was threatening to dial.

“I haven’t even said yes yet.” She reminded him, reaching in every direction he managed to squeeze his hand into. 

“Yet?” He asked her teasingly, moving in to kiss her lips. 

She sighed happily against his touch, whispering “Okay, maybe marrying you wouldn’t be so bad if it means you’ll keep doing that.” 

She switched off the water and climbed out of the shower to dry off, she opened the door that conjoined her bathroom and her bedroom, wrapping her towel around her clean body. Jay was awake, lazily watching her with a tired smile across his lips. 

“So it wasn’t a dream?” He questioned. The sight of his half naked partner answered it for him. She walked back over to the bed, climbed on top of it and ran her hand up and down his bare chest. 

“If it was, then we’re having the same one.”

“And we have to go to work soon?” He asked, spotting the clock on Erin’s bedside table. 

“Yep, so you’d better get up so we can swing by your place, unless you want to do the walk of shame into work today.”  
Jay laughed and rolled over, the sheets fell off his body and Erin had to look away, they were already going to be late, she didn’t want them to be suspiciously late. And they would be if she didn’t look away from his hot body. 

“Don’t call him.” She’d begged him, and he’d handed her phone back like a gentleman. They’d made out for ten minutes straight and Erin couldn’t help but imagining similar situations happening in the near future. Jay had begun driving soon after that, stopping outside a church, Erin had called him crazy, but he wasn’t listening. “We don’t even have a ring!” She reminded him as he walked up the old church steps, she had no choice but to follow him inside. 

“Do they even marry people on short notice?” She’d whispered as they walked through the foyer, Jay grabbed hold of her hand and shrugged his shoulders. “I don’t know, I’ve never been married.” 

She had laughed, this was all too bizarre. 

“Excuse me!” Jay had called out to a man who was standing out the front of the empty church. Erin felt her cheeks heat up, was he seriously doing this?

“I was wondering what it would take for my girl and I to get married tonight.” He asked, pulling her along with him as he wandered down the aisle. Erin pushed a smile onto her face for effect. 

“I’m just a new pastor, I’m not sure you can just turn up. It’s not a chapel in Vegas.” The young man told him.

“It’s just, we’re detectives and we’re going undercover for a few months and I don’t want to wait that long to marry my girl.” Jay told him, Erin leaned into him, pressing a gentle kiss against his lower ear lobe, whispering subtly, “You can’t lie in a church Jay.”

“We’ll I’ve never married someone before, but I think we have some of the paper work in the office...” 

Jay squeezed Erin’s hand, “That would be great if you could check.” Jay told him sincerely. 

When Erin walked into work an hour later, she pulled her jacket down over her hands. She couldn’t bring herself to take off the ring, it was too important. She just hoped nobody would question her over it since they all knew she wasn’t exactly the jewellery wearing type of gal. 

Jay had driven himself to work in his own car so she’d beat him there, everyone was carrying on as normal, and she felt like screaming out that everything had changed, but she would never actually cause such a scene. 

When Jay eventually walked up those stairs, she almost fell off her chair. There he was, her husband, her secret husband at that. He looked perfect and she couldn’t even react. 

The pastor had somehow managed to print out a marriage licence for the pair of them, and Jay was over the moon. She knew this because he kept telling the pastor as much, between kissing her of course. Her head was flooded with thoughts, she didn’t know how she felt. Marriage was never something she’d thought about. Her whole life had been independent, she’d seen her parents and how that worked out for them, and she’d seen Voight lose his wife and how it nearly killed him. She was never the kind of girl who collected magazine articles or planned her dream wedding before she was sixteen, she’d never imagined wearing a white gown or what type of flower arrangements she wanted, but she’d never thought she’d be getting married in a church in the middle of the night with a beginner minister and her partner by her side. 

Of course when the question came there was always the option of rejecting the notion of saying “I do.” But she didn’t want to do that, she didn’t want to keep pushing him away. This was Jay, and he was in love with her. She wasn’t going to let it all slip away. 

As they stood facing each other Erin couldn’t help but smile as Jay looked at her like she was the only person on the planet who actually mattered. And when he finally spoke his vows she realised that maybe he had been thinking about the possibility of marrying her because every word came straight from his heart.   
“Erin Lindsay, the moment I first saw you I knew that there was going to be something special between us. I’m not usually this sappy, but there’s just something about a woman who can fire a fire arm the way you do. I never thought that there would be a day when I’d be brave enough to come out and tell you how I felt, but I’m glad I did. Every day we’re out there in the field, every day our lives are on the line and not once have you ever let me fall. You’re going to be my partner for life, and there’s something so surreal about that. I’m not even sure why you love me back, but there won’t be a single day for the rest of your life when I don’t prove to you that your heart is safe with me. I love you Erin Lindsay.” 

She felt tears welling up in her eyes, she didn’t cry often, and she didn’t cry in front of Jay often but the combination of the way he was looking at her and the words he was saying were melting her heart in the best possible way. 

She reached out and grabbed his hand, “You’ve put up with me driving you around for a while now, and you always have my back. I never knew how much you felt for me but a part of me always hoped you would. I didn’t want to let you in, I didn’t want to admit that a part of me couldn’t stand the idea of you being with anyone else. But my pride got in the way and I should have just let myself feel for you sooner, all those times you hinted that you wanted more and I shut you down. It wasn’t because of Voight, it was because I was scared of how you made me feel, but I’m not scared anymore Jay. I’m going to be the best damn wife you’ll ever have.”

She bit her lip and glanced over towards the pastor, she didn’t know if you were allowed to say damn inside a church but he didn’t even flinch. 

“The power vested in me, in the state of Illinois and before the eyes of the lord, I pronounce you man and wife.” 

Jay didn’t hesitate before pressing his lips against Erin’s, even though the words “You may now kiss the bride.” Hadn’t even come from the pastor’s lips yet. 

Erin didn’t know how long they were going to keep their marriage a secret, but she knew that for the first time in years she was happy and that’s all that mattered. 

“Jay! We’ve got a lead.” She called out, grabbing her jacket off the back of her chair. Jay nodded and followed her down the stairs.


	3. Batter Up

Jay couldn’t stop thinking about it. In New York he had shrugged it off, when people assumed that he was dating Erin, usually he didn’t mind but for some reason he had found it awfully confronting. The assumption made him feel like his feelings were too obvious, to everyone except her. 

Even after he’d practically spelled out to her how he felt, she still apparently didn’t get it. This case, everything she’d learnt about her brother it had killed him not being able to comfort her the way he wanted to. He could give her a platonic pat on the back or some encouraging words but all he wanted to do was pull her into his arms and tell her that everything was going to okay.   
Now with that bastard behind bars, and th  
eir life was heading back to normal he still couldn’t get the conversation out of his head.   
“It’s not like that, we work together.”  
It was like that though, at least on his end.   
Erin was unlike any other woman he’d ever had feelings for. Allie was sweet and familiar, Gabby was funny and nurturing and Erin, well she was independent and strong minded, she challenged him and drove him completely mad, but she also had the biggest heart of anyone he’d ever known. She just didn’t have room for him in it.   
He was learning to live with that, and although he couldn’t be there for her the way he wanted to be, he could still be there for her as a friend.  
She answered her door, wearing only sweat pants and an old sweat shirt. She hadn’t expected any company.   
Jay held up a six pack of her favourite beer, she smiled and let him into her apartment, just like old times.  
“I didn’t know you were coming over.” 

“I didn’t tell you.” He reminded her, making himself comfortable on her couch. Erin didn’t join him straight away, she disappeared into her bedroom which Jay assumed meant she was getting changed, he didn’t mind though, he just focused his attention back to the television.   
Erin appeared a few minutes later, but to Jay’s surprise she wasn’t alone.   
“Teddy, hey man. How’re you?” Jay asked with forced cheer, Teddy gave him a funny look before sitting down on the other chair.   
“I’m fine, what are you doing here?” He asked accusingly, causing Erin to come to Jay’s defence.   
“You don’t have to be so rude, after all he’s done for you.” She snapped, crossing her arms over her chest.  
“Oh you’re right, I apologise.” Teddy mocked, using a posh tone of voice, Erin turned to Jay and mouthed an apology. “I am so sorry for all you’ve done for my dear sister here, keeping her sheets warm at night.”  
“Teddy!” Erin gasped, not bearing to look at Jay.

“What? You two are sleeping together, I get it. I mean look at him.” He eyeballed her partner up and down with a pleasant look on his face.  
“Yeah Erin, look at me.” Jay told her, causing her to throw a cushion at him.  
“The two of you are so immature.”   
Jay laughed, “Oh come on Erin, where is your sense of humour?” Jay asked, calling out to her. She’d retreated back into the kitchen, beer in hand.   
Teddy shrugged and turned back to the TV, and Jay wandered off to find her. She was standing hunched over the kitchen counter, eating or at least picking at a donut. He walked up beside her and spoke softly. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that.”  
She looked up at him, her eyes fierce. “Don’t encourage him, he’s been through a lot and he doesn’t know how to be nice to people anymore. He’s more me than I am.”   
Jay smiled, “There, see even you can joke.”   
She relaxed a little and finished off the rest of her snack. “I’m sorry for snapping, this whole thing has just blown my mind and I don’t know how to come back from that.”  
“Lean on me, I’ve got your back remember?”  
“That’s why you need back up.” She quoted, meeting his eye. 

Jay smiled; he did a lot of that while he was around her. “Look Erin, don’t take what he said personally. A lot of people think we’re sleeping together, and if you want them to keep thinking you could do someone as great as me then you don’t have to tell them the truth.”  
She snorted, “You’ve got that backwards pal. Everyone thinks you’re the one whose pitching out of your league.”  
“Oh trust me, I’m a great pitcher and you’re not even in my ball park.”  
“Oh really?” She cackled, shaking her head.   
Jay was well aware of how close they were standing, and he wondered if she was taking notice as well.   
Erin’s eyes flickered downwards, landing on his lips. Her upper half moved slightly forward and Jay was in a daze, he couldn’t move a muscle. She leaned in and he thought for sure his heart actually stopped beating, right up until the last second when she pulled away faster than lightning.

“Batter up.” She laughed and grabbed another donut, leaving him standing in the kitchen.  
He chased after her, grabbing her hand, she turned around with an amused look on her face. “Don’t tell me you’re scared of finally stepping up on that plate, you don’t know if you’ll be able to hit that ball far enough to get to first base.” He stopped himself realising that there were already baseball analogies, he shook it off. It didn’t even matter. “You don’t want to strike out, but Erin who says you will? Who to say that you won’t hit a home run and go all the way if you just step up to the plate and let that ball come straight at you, who is stopping you from hitting that ball straight out of the park?”  
“The catcher Jay, he’ll stop us every time.”

She didn’t have to tell him who the catcher was, he already knew he was talking about Voight.  
“So, hit the ball out of his reach.” He moved forward, cupping her cheeks, and looking into her eyes.   
“Step up to the plate Erin.” He whispered, their faces inched closer, “Get to first base.” He added as their lips met between them.  
Maybe if Teddy hadn’t chosen the next moment to call out for the pair of them, they might have gone to second, or even third. But Jay didn’t care about the what if’s, because he’d just kissed Erin Lindsay, and she kissed him back.


	4. Chapter 4

When he bumped into her, her first thought was to give the stranger a piece of her mind. So when she met his eye, it was a surprise for her to suddenly feel an overwhelming sense of insecurity. 

His eyes were sky blue, and he wore one of those boyishly charming grins that she's always been a sucker for. A warm feeling fell over her, like sunshine was hitting her right in the heart, but she couldn’t just stand there on the sidewalk all morning talking to attractive men. She had a job to get to.

"I'm sorry." He spoke in an awkward ramble, she couldn't help but smile at how pathetic he actually sounded. It was cute.

"I'm late." She told him, directing her thumb in the direction she was headed. He nodded, shaking his head in embarrassment. She could tell by the way that he was smiling that he was trying to forget the fact that he's almost run her over on the sidewalk. 

"Again, I'm sorry." He smiled, walking backwards away from her. She couldn't help but laugh as they both turned around and went their separate ways. 

She hadn't thought about him since that moment, not until a week later when she was first in line at the coffee hut a few streets from the station, her hands were already ruffling through her purse when a handful of dollar bills rushed past her. 

"I'll take her order." A voice had snuck up behind her. She hadn't even noticed the younger male was even in the shop, but then again she had only one thing on her mind, and that was the coffee he was now handing over to her ever so politely. 

"Thanks." She told him with uneasiness leaking in her voice. 

"Don't sound so excited." He teased, following her towards the exit. 

"I can afford my own coffee." She insisted as he held open the glass door for her. It had been a while since any man had been so chivalrous, it had been even longer since she's allowed any to be that way. 

"I know you can detective." He assured her as he stepped out from the door way, it slammed shut behind them as they continued walking side by side down the concrete bend. 

Erin sipped slowly on her drink, the last thing she needed was a burnt tongue to start of her morning. "How'd you know I'm a detective?" She asked, suddenly suspicious. She'd seen this guy twice in her life, neither times had she briefed him on her occupation. 

"Don't look so alarmed, your badge is showing." He laughed, she couldn't help but smile as she hung her head from temporary embarrassment. 

"Good to know where your eyes have been." She snorted finally. 

"I have family in the cop scene, I always notice a badge. Especially when it comes to beautiful woman I run into." He charmed, she wasn't buying it or maybe she was. The smile he wore so well, the way he made her laugh. This guy knew what he was doing. 

"I'm late for work." She told him, ignoring the words he'd just expressed. She wasn't ready for this, to let someone charm her off her feet. She wasn't that kind of girl to begin with. 

"Again?" He questioned with a raised eyebrow, causing guilt to wash over her. 

"How about the next time you plan to run into me, pick an earlier time slot." 

And with that she walked away. 

It was her partner, Jay Halstead who picked up on her newfound lateness, her jumpy attitude and the smile she wore on her face every time she was alone. 

He'd asked her about it. 

She'd told him there was nothing to tell. 

Of course he didn't believe her. 

She was stubborn however, which was why even after she'd run into her new friend a few more times, and started wearing scarves to work, Jay grew highly suspicious. 

"So, who’s the new guy?" He asked her one afternoon, they were on a stake out, his knee was pressed against the door of the passenger side, and she was looking through her camera lens at the time. 

"What new guy?" She asked, her tone squeaked upward, as she played along. 

"The one who’s got you smiling all the time like you've got some pretty little secret." He accused, dipping his hand into the open packet of crisps that sat between them. 

Erin laughed, "Oh come on, there is no guy. You just want an excuse to pry into my personal life." 

Jay scoffed. "As if." 

"Like you wouldn't jump at the chance to see what I'm like behind closed doors..." She had him there, he would jump given the chance. 

"It's me Erin, I know you have some guy. What? Are you scared I'll be jealous or something?" He pressed, hoping that's exactly what she wanted him to be. 

She turned to meet his eye, her face was blank, but her mind was all over. "You don't know him." 

 

Jay's eyebrows furrowed, "So there is a guy..." He’d guessed right of course, but he wished he hadn’t. He didn’t want Erin to be with another guy, not at all.

Erin groaned, "We're working. Just focus on the job." Her annoyance was clear, but Jay didn’t care. He was jealous.

"I will if you will." He taunted, causing her to roll her eyes aggressively. 

Neither one of them wanted to talk about this together, Jay didn't want to know if she was with someone, even though he knew she was and Erin didn't want him to know about it either. It's not like they were a possibility, but neither one of them felt that they weren't either. 

The stake out was a bust, and Jay was grumpy when they finally pulled up outside the precinct that evening, the night air was cool and Erin hadn't been expecting to see her new suitor, yet there he was leant up against her car. She looked at Jay with an uneasy gulp as she treads across the sidewalk. 

His eyes followed her like a clueless puppy as he tried to hone in on the guy's face. He didn't consider himself an overly jealous person, but the burning in his gut was driving him crazy as he watched the pair smooch up in their loving greeting. He would have walked away if his car wasn't parked behind his partners. 

He tried to keep his eyes to himself, and his ears on his own business but it was a harder task than he'd like to admit. He swallowed thickly as he reached into his pockets for his car keys. 

He could hear Erin laughing, something she did so rarely without sarcasm. It almost made him smile until he realised he wasn't the one causing it. 

"We should get home, I'm beat." He could hear her saying just metres away. He jiggled his keys into the lock on the driver’s side of his vehicle, trying his hardest to keep his eyes down but it was proving to be impossible. That should be him, he should be the one leaning against her car and making her giggle like a school girl. He should be the one she covers hickies up for at work. Not some other guy. 

He couldn't get away fast enough, he was gone in a flash without so much as checking the pair out in his rear view mirror. 

Erin didn't know what had come over her, her guard was down and it was all down to this one man. She didn't have to talk about work, he didn't call her by her last name and Voight wasn't breathing down her back about him either. It was simple, and that's all that mattered to her. 

That's all that mattered when he'd pick her up over his shoulder and drop her down on her bed, as she screamed when he tickled her, and laughed as he bad jokes. She couldn't help but feel happiness erupt inside of her without warning and she didn't know what to do about it. 

Jay had noticed the change, but he hadn't mentioned it to her. She noticed the way he avoided her even though he tried to hide it. 

It was late afternoon, the office was quieting down and Erin was ready to get home. 

She was startled when hands grabbed for her in the foyer. Her eyes nearly popped out of her head when she noticed who they belonged to. "Will." She smiled, looking around to see who was watching. Luck was on her side since Sergeant Platt had already retired for the evening. 

"What're you doing here?" She asked, still wary of where they were. The last thing she needed was for Voight or one of the other guys walking downstairs and seeing them together. She'd never live it down. 

"I thought I'd cook you dinner tonight." He smiled, his lips curled upward revealing his pearly white teeth in a smile that sent shivers down her spine. 

"Well that sounds nice." She admitted, a smile rose upon her own lips at the sound of that very idea. 

"Are you ready to head home?" He asked, noticing her behaviour. He didn't want to believe that she was ashamed of him but for some reason that's exactly how he was suddenly feeling. "Do you want me to wait outside?" He asked, looking over her shoulder. 

She looked up at him, she loved how he towered over her, it just made him all the more appealing to her. He watched as she rest a hand on his stomach gently. "No, I'm good to go now." 

"Will?" A voice came from behind her, she looked up at her boy friend's face before turning to meet Jay's eye. 

"Jay." Will breathed, stepping aside from A very confused Erin. She didn't know the connection between her two love interests but she was about to. 

Jay held out his hand and Will gripped hold of him, leaning over to wrap his arms around the other man. They hadn’t seen each other in years, and this embrace was the closest they’ve been in a long time. 

"I didn't know you were in town." Jay told him once they'd both broken free of each other. 

"Yeah, well I must have misplaced your contact." Will shrugged, leaning back against the wall. 

Jay nodded and snuck a peak at Erin to see what she was thinking. "Will's my brother. I bet he didn't tell you that."

Erin turned toward Will with her arms crossed over her chest. "No he didn't." She admitted, feeling somewhat offended. 

"Oh well I'm sure he had his reasons." Jay said coldly, eying his brother with teasing eyes. 

"Sorry, I wasn't aware that my brother was an appropriate date topic. My apologies Erin, my brother likes all my girlfriends to know about him. Just so they know there's a better brother out there." 

Erin shot a glance at Jay who looked shocked by the words that left Will's mouth. "We don't have to do this." She said go both of them. "Let's just be adults. You two can have your beef, but keep me out of it." 

The two Halstead boys watched as Erin walked towards the door. It wasn't until she stopped just before the exit did they realise she wasn't upset with them. "Will, are you coming or what?" She asked, nodding her head towards the door. 

He turned toward his brother and shrugged, "I'll see you around." 

Will noticed the difference in Erin that evening, she was distant and tried to act as though she was completely fine but he could see it in her eyes, she was elsewhere and he couldn't help but figure it had something to do with his dear older brother. 

As she lay in his arms later that evening, he stroked the pad of his thumb up and down her tiny arm as she breathes heavily out into the cold air. He could feel her thinking, like she was thinking with her entire body. "Erin?" He whispered, but she pretended she hadn't heard him. 

When he awoke the following morning, she was already dressed and ready for work. He felt so out of place laying in her bed still half asleep, his hair a mess and his clothes spread out all over her floor. 

"Morning sleepy head." She called over to him from her conjoining bathroom suit. He held a palm over his eyes to stop the light bulb from blinding him so early in the day. 

"Come back to bed." He groaned, reaching for one of her pillows. He wasn't a morning person at all. 

"I can't, I'm late." She told him, an amused smile across her chapsticked lips. 

He groaned again which only made her amusement grow. 

"You're always late." He spoke into the pillows, his words were muffled but she knew what he was saying. 

"You always say that." She sang, grabbing her car keys and her badge from her night stand. She hovered over his side of the bed and began to pull down the pillows from his face. His eyes remained closed since the ceiling light was awfully bright. She pressed her lips against his forehead, informing him that he was being a big baby as she pulled herself away. 

He grabbed her wrist and pulled her back down on top of him, she laughed as she tried to break free. "I'm late!" She screamed between giggles, until he finally gave her mercy and let her finally leave for work. 

 

As she walked into district 21, Jay was right behind her. She didn't have time for his judgment, she just wanted to walk into her place of work and get on with her day. He boots clicked against the steps as she ran up them two at a time, without knowing that Jay was right behind her. 

"You do realise he's younger than you right?" He asked out of nowhere. She didn't realise how close he had gotten, it scared her half to death. 

"Don't sneak up on me like that." She scoffed as she crossed her arms over her chest. 

"My bad." He retorted, opening the door for her. 

She stepped straight in, not sticking around for further attitude from her partner. She didn't have time for it nor did she have the patience. 

To her delight she could hear Jay engaging in conversation with Platt at the front desk, it made her smile as she rushed up the stairs to where she was safe from personal dramas. 

 

Her eyes locked onto Voight's, who was watching her as she walked in through the middle of the desk filled room. He smiled slightly as she walked over to her desk. She didn't want to believe that people were staring at her, but she couldn't help but feel like there were more eyes on here than there should have been. 

"Got nothing better to do?" She asked, narrowing her eyes toward Adam who was the unlucky one to be caught. He looked stunned, like he wished the floor would open up and swallow him, which was a shame because Erin wished the opposite. 

Adam opened his mouth to speak but no words came to his rescue. Erin thought that would be the end of it all until Jay finally walked into the room; he exchanged an awkward glance with Antonio who she assumed knew all about what had happened the previous evening. This wasn’t what she wanted, she thought that dating someone new, who was outside of the emergency service gig would be simple and easy, and that there would be no complications but she was wrong, and the worst part to top all of this off was that she actually liked Will.

 

Neither Halstead brother knew what was lurking behind Erin's pretty eyes, for weeks she continued the charade that everything was fine, she'd treat Jay with friendly smiled and witty banter during the daylight hours, and would come home to Will who she'd wind down beside with a couple of beers and whole lot of kisses. 

It wasn't until Will had to leave town for a weekend did Jay finally have the guts to question her about it all. He couldn't fathom how she could continue seeing Will after finding out who he was. The same girl who told him months prior that maybe he'd have a chance someday, but right in the now it seemed like that wasn't even a possibility. He didn't want to be the guy who ended up with his brother's ex, but apparently that's what he would have to live with if he wanted to be with her. Despite the fact that he knew her first, that he'd fallen for her long before Will came back to town. 

Everyone had settled down at Molly's for a Friday night beer, Erin had walked in alone and Jay was already setting his sights on her. She was only wearing a t'shirt, her jacket slung over her folded arms. He walked over as quickly as he could without bringing unwanted attention upon himself. He stood in front of her and smiled lazily, drink in his hand. "Can I buy you one?" He asked, motioning towards two empty bar stools. 

Her eyes flickered upward to meet with his, a small delicate smile creased her lips upward as she spoke. "Sure." 

She didn't say a thing, it intrigued her to watch as he partner ordered her drink without skipping a beat. He remembered her order, and that was awfully sweet to her. 

Maybe they had spent too much time together, or maybe he just paid attention during those times. 

"So, where's the blonde?" She asked once her drink was sitting nearly in front of her. Jay took his eye off the television hanging in the corner of the room. His eyebrows threaded together in confusion. 

"What blonde?" He questioned, reaching across the bar for a napkin. 

"You know." She teased, nudging his shoulder with her own. "I saw you with one a few weeks back, she was cute." 

"Why aren't you dating her then?" He joked, chuckling as he wiped the drop he'd spilt so nervously. 

"Because you'd love that just a little too much." She wriggled her eyebrows knowingly which caused him to smile yet again. 

He waited until their laughter faded, and their smiles turned into blank faces before speaking again. It's not that he didn't love the banter they shared or the smiles that lit up Erin's face, he loved all of it. He just didn't want their conversation to get lost in between the joking and the laughter. 

"I heard my little brother had to leave town." He started off, despite the groans he heard coming from beside him he didn't give up. 

"We're not doing this." She retorted firmly, this was not happening as long as she had something to say about it. 

"What?" He asked, shrugging his shoulders a little too far. 

She shook her head as well as her index finger. "This, talking about Will." 

"Is that what he's calling himself these days?" He chuckled before taking another sip from his glass. "He spent years hating that name." 

"Well that's a great memory you have there, let me leave you to reminisce." 

He didn't want her to leave, so when she reached for her jacket and headed towards the door he followed her outside. 

"I didn't mean anything by it." He tried to reason, but she was walking faster than he could spout apologies. 

"Erin!" He called out as he tried to catch her up. 

People dodging was something Erin did daily, rushing after criminals through crowds had become a second nature to her so when Jay was trying to keep up she had no trouble walking straight through all of the night people. He watched her from his height as she neared the end of the crowd, her hands were hugging her body as she found the curb and he finally caught up. 

"Why are you with him?" He asked softly as they stood side by side against the bend in the road. 

"I'm happy, just let me stay that way." 

"Did you or did you not say that we'd have a shot some day?" He asked, clearly hurt. He wanted to be the one who made her happy. 

"It's not our time right now, I'm not sure if it ever will be." Those very words hurt her to say, she knew it and Jay could hear it in her voice but neither of them said anything about it. Jay was too busy getting upset. 

"I should have known!" His voice began to rise along with his anger. "I'm so stupid!" A bitter laugh fell from his lips as he avoided her eye. She was looking up at him, the way the streetlight hit his face but hid his broken eyes. She felt a piece of her breaking, but there was nothing she could do, nothing she would do. She was too stubborn to admit that she might be making a mistake, that hurting Jay was never in her plan. It was too late to take it back and that killed her. 

"He did this on purpose! He's always had this stupid mentality, believing that I always stole his girl but he'd never man up and admit he liked them, now the bastard's done the same thing to me." 

Erin knew he wasn't exactly saying any of this to her, but she couldn't help but take in every word he was ranting. She didn't feel like Will had stolen her, or that she was ever Jay's to begin with but she could tell that's exactly how he was feeling right now, whether he believed it later or not, it's what he believed right then and there. If she was honest with herself, she'd realise that maybe she liked that. 

“Jay!” She snapped her fingers out in front of him, he was still in a frenzy, anger still filled his eyes, and ran through his veins but her voice was pulling him back to the surface. The sweetness in her eyes reminded him why he was there in the first place. 

She reached out and took his arm gently between her fingers, her hand remained there, loosely wrapped around his wrist, they were barely touching but her voice hitched as she spoke. “Calm down.” She whispered, but instead of letting go of his arm, she tightened her hold ever so slightly. His eyes flickered to their embrace, his tongue pushed against the inside of his lips. What was she doing? Why was she being so gentle with him?

“I just don’t know why you’re dating my brother, when I’m right here.” He whispered pain stricken tone came out stronger than either one of them anticipated. He ran his other hand over his face, frustration setting in like a bad case of realisation.   
“I know exactly where you are.” She spoke into the darkness, Jay’s eyes were still looming under the spot light, and her heart was beating against her chest. She didn’t know why she was still standing here, but at the same time she knew the exact reason. 

He looked down at her hand still wrapped around his wrist, he didn’t want her to let go but she had to, he pushed gently against her fingers releasing himself from her hold. “Is it serious?” 

She shook her head. “Not from where I’m standing.” 

He nodded, that was something to ease his soul. He still didn’t like the idea of them together, in fact he hated it’s very existence as a relationship. A part of him knew there was nothing he could do, this was her life and he was merely a part of it. She was a strong minded woman who didn’t need him to tell her what to do, and he wouldn’t dream of doing that to her. He just never expected that she’d be with someone else. It never occurred to him that it would be his own flesh and blood. 

“That’s something.” He whispered, mostly to himself although he wasn’t afraid of what she could hear. He took a step back, not to get away but to take in his thoughts, the lights were no longer glowing on his face, Erin was watching him step into the darkness, her eyes were watering but he didn’t have the energy to figure out why. Was any of this affecting her? Were his feelings enough for her? He didn’t know. 

“It’s everything.” He swore he heard her say, it was too quiet to tell, and maybe he was too drunk to really be listening to voices in the wind but there stood the girl he loved, the girl who was everything he could have asked for, the very woman who taught him exactly what longing felt like. She stood there in the flesh and she wasn’t walking away. 

He wasn’t thinking, or maybe he was thinking too hard, because before he knew what he was doing, he’d walked into the space between the pair and his hands had found their way onto her face, cupping her jaw like he’d never seen such a beauty before in his life, she didn’t tell him to stop, she didn’t push him off or walk away. Instead there they stood in a dimly lit street with nothing but the breeze to keep them company, he pressed his lips against hers, and she pressed back. 

They were kissing, and neither one of them made a move to end it. 

Will was already home when Erin walked in later that evening, she hadn’t known he’d been returning so soon. If she had maybe she wouldn’t have felt the way she did when she spotted him sitting on her sofa. 

Tears spilled down her cheeks once she’d realised exactly what she’d done. It wasn’t like she hadn’t known the consequences before, when she’d let Jay kiss her, when she’d let herself kiss him back. Now, looking right at the brother she’d come home to. It was then she realised how selfish she’d become in a matter of hours. 

“Erin, what’s wrong?” Will asked, springing to his feet, it upset her that he was rushing to her ready to give her comfort. She didn’t need comfort, she needed honesty. She was about to hurt someone she cared about and it was going to hurt her more than she realised. 

She shook her head and held a hand out in front of her. She couldn’t do this to him, she couldn’t do this to Jay. Voight was right, she did break hearts and she was always going to do that. “I kissed Jay tonight.” She admitted, tears falling hot and heavy down her reddened cheeks. The words that fell from her lips were like a punch to Will’s gut. She read his emotions that spread across his face once he’d registered the words she’d said out loud. 

The girl he wanted, the girl he’d finally found something with had yet again chosen his older brother. She started crying heavier when he looked down at his shoes, searching for the words to say. She expected him to get upset, the yell or tell her that she hurt him but there was nothing but silence. 

The silence was drowned out by the sounds of her crying, but Will didn’t make a sound. He picked up his jacket and walked straight past her and right out the door, leaving her alone with her guilt. 

The sound of Will’s car screeching off down her street set her off all over again, she sat herself down on the very sofa he had been sitting on before as she replayed everything that had happened. 

The words Jay had spoken when their lips had parted. 

The words she’d finally said out loud, the words that had been keeping her awake at night for months. 

She was in love with Jay Halstead. 

Her tears stung her eyes as she wiped them away, the look on Will’s face would probably haunt her for some time, but there was no way she could have let him leave without knowing the truth. She owed him that. 

The clock chimed midnight and she reached for her phone. 

Jay picked up on only the second ring.

“Miss me already?” He asked in a preppy tone. 

She started to chuckle, but her emotions got the best of her. She tried to hide it, but Jay knew her too well.

“Erin? What’s wrong?” He asked, his overprotective side kicking in.

“I told him Jay, I had to. He’s gone.” 

She could hear him on the other end, shuffling things around. “Erin, I love you but someone else needs me more right now.” He told her, walking out to his car. Erin couldn’t help but smile. 

“Make sure he’s alright?” 

“I’ll let you know.”   
“I love you Jay.” She whispered, and Jay still couldn’t believe the words he’d just heard for the second time that evening.


	5. Christmas

Erin reached on her tip toes, trying her hardest not to tip over the entire Christmas tree. She'd forgotten all about borrowing a step ladder from someone this year, and now she was paying the price. As a kid she never had the chance to have a proper Christmas which was why as an adult she was always so determined to make it special. Although she wasn't the type to organise secret Santa or to mail off handmade Christmas cards, she did however allow the contents of her apartment be decorated from top to bottom with Christmas cheer. This year she was excited to have a brand new glass angel to top her tree. Jay had promised to stop by and exchange gifts but she wanted the tree to be perfect before he arrived. Since he had no family around she'd offered to share Christmas with him but he kindly declined saying he was spending it with Allie's family. She'd understood, although she couldn't help but feel the sting of rejection. 

The knock on her front door had come too early. She cursed almost falling over. Luckily her angel was still intact. She placed it down on her couch wanting to make sure it didn't get stepped on or broken. She rushed to answer the door, shaking her hair in front of the mirror before answering. 

"Voight." She smiled, trying not to show her disappointment. 

"I thought I'd come and see how the tree's going." He told her, walking in and making himself comfortable. It had been a while since he'd stopped by unexpected. She bit down on her glossed lip and tried to think of what she could do to make him leave, but in her heart she just couldn't toss him out. This was Voight, he was family. 

"It's up. I just can't reach the top." She complained walking over to her angel. She held it up to show him just to prove her dilemma. 

He placed a bottle of wine down on her kitchen counter, and made it his mission to take the angel off her hands. 

She stood back and watched as he gently placed the glass ornament right on the very top of her plastic tree. She smiled, it did look as good as the picture.

"Huh, money well spent." She commented, patting Voight on the back. 

"You still want me to come over tomorrow?" He asked her. They'd made plans to spend Christmas at her place this year since Justin wasn't around. It was her very first time cooking which made her nervous but Voight was never one for overly spectacular meal displays. He didn't care about the food, only the company. 

"Yeah, we're good for tomorrow." She confirmed looking anxiously toward the clock. 

"You waiting for someone?" He asked catching her off guard. 

"I uh, just Jay is stopping by." She was going to lie, but right as she started speaking the truth just blurted out. She couldn't help herself, it was Christmas after all and she had nothing to be ashamed of. Her and Jay were just friends, partners. That's all. 

Voight's amusement clung to his face like a sloth hanging from a tree. She could see he was holding back a laugh, the way his lips twitched as he grinned. She hated that this was funny to him, because clearly the situation wasn't humorous at all. He needed to leave and quick. Jay was going to arrive any minute. 

"You want me to leave don't you?" Voight asked with a slight tease in his tone. 

She tilted her head to the side with a look that challenged "What do you think?" 

He laughed softly and reached for his jacket. "Say hello to your boyfriend for me." He joked, she rolled her eyes and pushed him down the hallway. He was putting his feet down stalling her. 

As soon as they made it to the door he turned to face her. "It may be the holiday season but if any funny business happens, it's to end before you come back to work next week." He warned. 

"No funny business is going down. We're just friends." She emphasised on the word friends just to get him to leave her alone. 

"Erin." 

"Hank." She mimicked. 

He shrugged and reached for the door handle, Jay was just about to knock when he came face to face with his boss. 

"Halstead." Voight greeted him with a nod before bypassing him in the hallway on his way to the elevator. 

"Sorry." Erin grimaced knowing how awkward that must had been for him. 

He took in a nervous breath and shook his head. "Don't worry about it." 

She invited him inside and offered him a drink. He eyeballs the wine and she catches his glance. "You don't want to drink that, your number one fan just dropped it off." 

Jay nodded. "A beer if you've got one." 

"Coming right up." 

Jay looked around Erin's apartment. He had never pegged her to be the jolly type. Her kitchen was layered with tinsel and her walls hung with Christmas artwork. Her tree however was the main attraction, it stood tall with ornaments and lights hanging around it, there were presents wrapped and sitting underneath like the trees you often saw in the movies. He was impressed by all of this work she'd put into the holiday. 

"Didn't think I was a Christmas person HUH?" She asked, handing him a fresh cold beer straight from her fridge. 

He snapped out of it and turned to face her. "Never would have guessed. Are you going to dress up like an elf too?" 

“That comes tomorrow, what a shame you’ll miss it.” She purred, walking over to her sofa and making herself comfortable. Jay followed after her and sat down beside her. Erin looked down at their knees that were now touching before returning her glance to the tree that literally lit up the room.

“So, what did you get me this year?” She asked him, hoping he’d give in and tell her. They’d only known each other for two Christmas’ but they’d created a tradition. They’d get together on Christmas Eve to exchange gifts, only to open them when they weren’t together. She’d made sure that she kept Christmas Eve free ever since they’d started that. 

“You’ll find out tomorrow.” He reminded her squeezing her knee gently. She felt a shiver run throughout her body. 

“I’m sure it’s great whatever it is.” She smiled, meeting his eye. 

“You want to know what this apartment is missing?” He asked after a moment of awkward silence. Erin quickly looked away from their locked gaze and sipped from her beer. 

“What’s that?” She questioned, looking around the room for something she’d forgotten.

“Mistletoe.” He chuckled, “I mean you’re going to have the fireman over for Christmas aren’t you?”

“We broke up, a while ago. I’m surprised you didn’t remember that.” She cocked her eyebrow, he’d always seemed to be well informed of her personal life. 

“I remembered.” He whispered, meeting her eyes again.

For a moment she thought he was going to do it, lean over and kiss her. She knew it would totally and completely complicate everything but for some reason she didn’t care. She just wanted to try it, to see how it felt but Jay didn’t make a move, all he did was look at her with those twinkling eyes and mark his lips to the top of his beer bottle, she watched him swallow his mouthful, her own throat mimicked his actions as she couldn’t keep her eyes away.

“Do you want me to put it under the tree now?” He asked, leaning forward as if he was about to stand up. 

“Yeah, go ahead.” She nodded, pretending to be engrossed by her drink. 

Jay stood up and walked over to the tree. He pulled out a small gift wrapped box and placed it under the tree. It wasn’t the biggest present, it was probably the smallest under her tree but she already knew it came from a big heart. 

“You totally checked my ass out when I bent over didn’t you?” He asked with a cheeky smirk as he turned around. 

She laughed along, shaking her head at him like she couldn’t believe he would suggest such a thing. His eyes still had that twinkle and for some reason when he smiled it became brighter and brighter. 

“You know what, maybe I do have some mistletoe around here.” She stood up and moved away, pretending to go and find the plant. Jay’s mouth opened like he wasn’t believing what he had just heard. She looked through the several boxes filled with decorations she hadn’t yet hung.

“Wait, seriously?” He asked after a minute had passed and she still hadn’t surfaced from the box.

“Yeah, maybe once you finally kiss me you’ll find out what all the fuss is about.” She teased, walking back over to him. 

“Well did you find it?”

She shook her head, “I might have some in one of my closets though.” Jay couldn’t get past the idea of Erin suggesting she was going to kiss him. He tried to catch her eye to see if she was bluffing but every glance they exchanged proved nothing of the sort. 

She was about to leave the room in search of the missing mistletoe when Jay reached out and grabbed her by the arm. She turned, meeting his eye about to ask what he was doing when he took a step forward, she looked up into his eyes and her breath hitched in her throat. He leaned down without a word spoken between them, his breath hit her cheek before their lips met in the middle, she closed her eyes and soaked in what was happening. Her lips melted against his, it was like melted chocolate running down your throat, a sensation that was both hot and delicious. When their lips left each others. Erin looked up at him with wide eyes, she touched her fingers to her lips and looked away.

“What was that for?” She asked.

“We don’t need mistletoe.”


	6. Halloween

Nadia raced over to Erin with a beanie filled with folded up pages of notebook paper. Erin glanced down with a quizzical expression worn on her face. Nadia pushed it closer towards her friend, “It’s your turn.” She insisted, giving Erin one of the biggest smiles she’d ever produced.  
“I don’t really do Halloween.” Erin reminded her, turning back to her paperwork. Nadia followed her around to the backside of her desk, falling to her needs and folding her hands together. Her eyes were pleading like a child in manipulation mode. Erin rolled her eyes. “It’s not going to work.”

“Oh come on Erin, don’t be such a party pooper.” Jay teased from across the room. She shot him a look, one that said if he spoke again she’d poor his coffee right down his front. He held a hand up in defence and looked back down at his work.  
“I’ve never had a Halloween party before.” Nadia played. She wanted to guilt Erin into getting involved but of course she wasn’t being cooperative.  
“What’s in the hat anyway?” Erin asked. Her attention didn’t leave the page she was writing on, but Nadia could feel her starting to take an interest.  
“They’re what you have to dress up as.” Nadia explained, pulling out the piece of notepad she’d drawn herself. It was crumpled up inside her pocket, she smiled and began unfolding it.  
“See! I’m going as Pocahontas” She showed her excitedly. Her whole body bounced in excitement, and it was near impossible to keep from smiling when Nadia was like this. Erin hated giving in after putting her foot down but this time she made an exception.  
“Alright, give me one.”

Nadia reached down to grab her beanie quickly, holding it out in front of her ready for Erin to make her selection.  
Erin slid her hand into the hat with a undeniable resistance, she felt around the slips of paper as if she could blindly feel for a good costume. She pulled one up and began to unfold it. She read the name scrawled over the small piece of paper and gave Nadia an unappreciative stare. “Sandy from Grease. Really?” She scowled; this was a stupid idea even more so now that she was being roped into dressing up in a cat suit.  
“I’ll see you tomorrow night at Molly’s.” Nadia smiled, trying to brighten up the mood that Erin had just left in the room.  
Everyone acknowledged Nadia’s invitation, since they had all already fallen for the costume trap. Alvin walked past Erin’s desk, she flagged him down. “Did she get to you too?” She asked, honestly thinking that the apocalypse would arrive before anyone could convince Alvin to dress up for Halloween.

He looked at her, “You’re young you should be thrilled at a chance to dress up.” Erin turned her head sideways, he wasn’t answering her question.  
“I unfortunately cannot make it, I promised my daughter we’d do something special that night. Such a shame, right?”  
Erin’s mouth gaped open, she stamped her foot against her desk. This wasn’t fair. How come Alvin got a free pass out of this nonsense? Alvin chuckled as he kept walking towards the break room.  
It was a struggle but Erin managed to find something to Grease herself up the following evening, she looked ridiculous and that was an understatement. It was bad enough that she was going to a party that celebrated such a childish holiday, but now she was dressing up and participating just to prove that she wasn’t a party pooper? She groaned as she stared at her reflection, she refused to wear the heels. She’d decided instead that Sandy 2.0 was more practical, and wore boots with her skin tight suit. She played around with her bra, making sure she at least looked alright up top, if she was going to be wearing something this tight she wanted to at least put out a good impression of herself since none of these people would ever see her dressed like this ever again.  
Kim had snuck over to help her curl her hair, which was fine with her since Voight hadn’t exactly taught her how to do all of that stuff when she was younger, but while Kim was getting changed into her slutty nurse costume in the other room, Erin was mildly freaking out.  
“Hey Kim do you think maybe I should just forget the whole thing?” She called out to her friend. Kim stuck her head between the door and the wall and shook her head.  
“Absolutely not, tonight you’re going to rock that outfit and have a great time.” She promised, pushing the door out of the way to reveal her own costume.  
Erin whistled, “You’re not going home alone tonight.” She told her, indicating for her to spin around. “You look smoking hot.”  
Kim’s face lit up, and a smile spread across her ruby red lips. Erin turned around to look at her reflection one last time. Kim walked up beside her and smiled at the faces that looked back at them.  
“Let’s go and get drunk.” Erin declared. That was the only portion of the evening she was looking forward to.

The music was already pumping; Erin could feel it as they walked down the footpath towards Molly’s. She gave Kim a small smile still unsure of herself. She’d been walking with her head down trying to avoid spotting her reflection in a window. “Stop worrying, you look great and tonight will be great too. You’ll see.” Kim told her as she walked into the bar. Erin took a deep breath before following her inside, her vision was filled with costumes of plenty, she chuckled to herself as she spotted Kelly dressed as a farmer. He waved at her before turning back to the conversation he was in. She scanned the room looking for a spare place to sit, when she spotted Nadia who waved her over.  
“You look cute.” Erin complimented the younger woman who had wrapped her arm over Erin’s shoulder in an awkward sideways hug. The two girls sat down beside each other, Erin on the outside and Nadia against the wall of the booth.  
“I thought you were going to bail.” Nadia said straight into Erin’s ear. Erin looked at her with a raised eyebrow.  
“Well I didn’t, but I’m going to need a drink.” She told her, standing up.  
“Oh yeah me too.” Nadia nodded, Erin placed her hand on Nadia’s shoulder.  
“I’ll get you a soda.” She chuckled, reminding her that she was a cop, and there was no way she would let her get away with drinking under aged.  
Nadia sighed, “Fine.”

Erin walked away laughing, she slipped in beside Kelly who was talking to Hermann behind the bar. She gave Hermann a look that said she needed something heavy. He nodded and excused himself.  
“Didn’t think dressing up was your thing?” Kelly teased her when Hermann had left to make her a drink.  
She smirked, “Well I’m here and you’re not allowed to tease me.”  
“If I do will you arrest me?” He flirted, the pair had dated on and off unexclusively for months, that was until Kelly had met some new girl who he was convinced he was now in love with.  
“You bet your ass.” She played along, as Hermann placed a glass in front of her. She had almost forgotten to get Nadia her soda, “Can I get a coke too? The hostess is only 19.” She explained and he grabbed another glass.  
“So um Sandy, it looks like Danny’s here.” Kelly motioned towards the entryway of the bar. Erin swiped herself around to see Jay walking in, wearing black slacks and t-shirt and a cream varsity jacket, his hear was even slicked back with an excessive amount of hair gel. Her mouth fell open.  
“Will you excuse me for a moment?” She asked Kelly, taking a large gulp of her drink and placing it back on the counter. She quickly stormed over to Nadia, yanking her by the arm. “Is this your way of playing cupid?” She asked angrily, pointing over to where Jay was talking to a few of the firemen.  
Nadia shook her head nervously, “He picked it out of the hat like you! I swear.”  
Erin groaned and marched back over to her drink. “I shouldn’t have come.” She muttered, downing the rest of the liquor.  
Kelly chuckled, “Come on, it’s pretty funny. What are the odds?”  
She glared at him, why did everyone find this so amusing? The only thing that could make her night worse would be if Jay noticed their matching costumes and quoted the movie to her.  
“Erin.” A voice behind her spoke before she had a chance to escape. Kelly had to look away to stop himself from laughing.  
“Jay.” She smiled politely, nodding toward Hermann for another drink.  
“Are you wearing lycra?” He asked in amusement. Erin moved a strand of her hair away from her face and shrugged.  
“Maybe.”  
He chuckled, taking a swig from his beer. “It looks good on you.”  
“Don’t make fun of me Jay, I already want to go home.” She warned, having had enough already.  
“It’s not that bad here is it?” He questioned her, making his way over to a spare seat, she didn’t know what came over her when she followed him but somehow she found herself sitting opposite him in a secluded portion of the bar.  
“Depends what you define bad.”  
“You look hot, every man in this bar has checked you out at least twice, there’s alcohol and you have good company. What’s bad about that?” He grinned, the room was crowded and everyone sounded like they were having a good time, she sighed and decided she just needed to relax.  
“I look hot?” She smirked, playing with the straw in her drink. Jay winked at her with a sleazy grin on his face. She couldn’t help but laugh.  
A table filled with empty bottles and stacks of shot glasses was the result of Erin and Jay trying to have fun together. They’d literally drunk the night away, and the bar was starting to empty. The pair were laughing and joking until Gabriella came over to college the empty glasses.  
“Do you need me to call you a cab?” She asked, and Erin shook her head. “I think you two have had enough for one night.”  
Erin rolled her eyes, “Okay fine.” She said groaning. She tried to stand up, almost landing face first on the floor.  
“I’m calling you a cab.” Gabby told them, reaching for her phone.  
Erin looked over at Jay and smiled, “You want to come over?” She asked him in a soft sincere whisper.  
Jay nodded. It was a deal.  
The pair fumbled up the stairs of Erin’s building. Erin kept laughing hysterically and Jay was holding onto the walls to keep himself from falling over. Erin threw her purse at him demanding he find her keys, he obliged and jammed them into her apartment keyhole.  
It took him a few attempts to unlock it in his drunken state but as soon as the door opened Erin pushed him inside.  
Her hands started tugging at his shirt, he helped her pull it up over his head. She slammed the front door closed and pulled him towards her bedroom. “You’re all mine tonight Mr Halstead.” She purred, kneeling down on her bed.  
Jay stood at the foot of her bed, wrapping his arm around her body trying to find the zipper to her suit. He couldn’t manage to work it which frustrated him. “First of all, it’s detective.” He growled into her ear causing her to giggle. He pushed her back onto the bed and straddled her. “And second, you’re all mine.” He corrected before crashing his lips against hers.  
Erin was excited, her hands snaked their way down his bare back, feeling for every nook and cranny that made up his sexy body. She slipped her hands into the back of his pants and giggled against his lips as he reacted.  
He rolled onto his back, her now on top of him. She stripped out of her Sandy clothes and climbed back onto him with only her underwear left. Jay’s eyes were black with lust while he watched her unhook her bra seductively. He let out a stifled moan, so she leaned down on top of him.

She trailed down his torso with hot, wet kisses, pausing just under his belly button she ripped open the top button of his black jeans. “Erin.” He whimpered in anticipation.  
She giggled. “Shh stud.” Jay’s eyes rolled back into his head when she started teasing him through his boxers, this over drove her to keep going. Like he was egging her on.  
“Cock your gun for me detective.” She cheered, pulling down his pants completely, Jay didn’t even hesitate, he kicked them off as quickly as he could manage and pulled her on top of him again.  
Their kisses were sloppy, but neither of them cared. They were still completely wasted, Erin rubbed herself against him wanting more. He groaned, running his fingers up and down her naked back.  
She straddled him finally, and moaned when he pushed himself into her, they couldn’t control their hands, still exploring, still wanting to feel more. Erin called out his name, something she’d been wanting to do for a while. He thrust into her, and was rewarded by a series of moans that escaped from Erin’s lips. She arched her back from pleasure, digging her nails into his skin. She was a screamer, something Jay had never imagined. He took advantage of the fact, hitting her in all the right spots. She screamed out when he came, telling him that they were definitely doing that some time soon. He chuckled, the energy he was just using had started to fade. She slipped herself off of him, and curled up into his muscular embrace. She yawned, snuggling into his chest thinking to herself. Maybe Halloween wasn’t so bad after all.


	7. It's Complicated

They'd had sex. 

Erin and Jay, and it had meant nothing. 

At least that's what they told themselves. 

Erin had made it clear that it was a one time thing, it wasn't. 

The morning after the second time, Erin made it perfectly clear that they weren't going to to let it happen again. 

"Imagine what Voight would do if he found out." She'd pointed out, Jay's boyish smile made her sigh. She didn't want to stop, not really, but it wasn't the right thing to do. They really shouldn't have done it, twice. 

"Who cares what Voight thinks, it's got nothing to do with him." Jay'd tried to remind her. He wasn't ready to stop yet, they'd only just begun. 

"I tell him everything, good or bad. I can't keep this from him so it has to stop before there's something to tell." 

"Well you were there last night when we slept together, or am I imagining that?" He laughed with a slice of bitterness on his tongue. 

She groaned, "Jay. Please don't be upset." 

He shook his head, "I'm not upset, just confused." 

That was fair considering all the mixed signals she'd been sending him lately. 

"We've got a lead to follow." She reminded him, leaving him standing alone in the break room. 

That wasn't the last time, in fact it happened every night that week and every time she told him it could never happen again, but Jay had learnt to keep his door unlocked every night because sure enough, she'd be there ready to pounce on him. A part of him felt used, the other part was happy. If this was the only way he could have her, then he wasn't about to give it all up. 

Not yet. 

This went on for weeks, she'd practically ignore him during the day, but her voice was the only thing he'd hear all night. 

One day he'd had enough. He didn't want to be her booty call any longer. It wasn't fair, she knew how he felt. She knew that every time she turned up at his place that he'd ask her to sleep over, like normal couples. She knew that every time she kissed him he imagined she meant it, every time she took off her clothes she took his breath away. And yet she didn't want a commitment. 

He cornered her just as everyone was rushing off. "I'm done with this." He told her flat out and she smirked. 

"Now you're sounding like me." She teased, expecting him to play along. 

"I'm sick of this hot and cold. You want a booty call why don't you call up your fireman or some other guy who doesn't respect you." 

She looked shocked, he'd completely stunned her silent. 

"You know how I feel about you and you're using me." 

"That's not fair, I'm not using you. If for a second you felt like an unwilling participant you could have stopped at any time but you didn't. Whose using who Jay?" 

His hands balled into fists. She knew how to rile him up. It made him so mad. "Using you? I would never use you Erin!" 

"Why would you keep sleeping with me then? Even after I rejected your advances, you just kept letting me in." 

"Because I love you and I thought that playing by your rules was the only way you'd realise you wanted to be with me." 

"I can't be with you!" She exclaimed, frustration boiling in her blood. She was so angry right now. The way Jay was blaming it all on her was driving her crazy. 

"You can be with me! You've always had that option." He cried, how could she not see this? 

"Right, because Voight wouldn't jump at the chance to kick you out of the unit." She snapped folding her arms angrily across her chest. 

"All you have to do is tell him you want to be with me, he loves you Erin. You and I both know that if you want something you get it. He wouldn't stand in your way if I was really what you wanted." 

"Who said you're what I really want?" She scoffed. 

"You did, every night in my bed." 

"Sex is different. It's less complicated." 

"Keep telling yourself that. If you change your mind, you'll know where to find me tonight." He told her before rushing off with the rest of the team. 

She didn't speak to him for the rest of the day, she was pissed and he'd expected her to be. He'd never talked to her that way before, never stood up for his feelings. He still couldn't believe that he'd done it. Which was why he locked his door later that night. He thought for sure that he'd blown it. 

That was until there was a knock. 

He opened the door wearing only his boxers, and there she stood staring back at him. 

"I talked to Voight." She told him and that's when he knew that everything was about to change.


End file.
